The Wakeful Brain Complaint Thread
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You have noticed the freebie tentacle mentioned in freebie sections, right?
Erm, no. :red: But I have a ginormous pile of tentacle goodness available to me, so I think I'm (perish the thought!) "tentacled out".
I need to do a render of the Brain getting ready to goose Vicky from behind.. heh heh heh! :snake:
It was clearly a home-defense situation, and I got a license for Concealed-Carrying squirrels too, so I am not particularly worried.
Here's a funny squirrel-related story I read several years ago:
Neighborhood Hazard (or: Why the Cops Won't Patrol Brice Street)
I never dreamed slowly cruising through a residential neighborhood could be so incredibly dangerous!
Studies have shown that motorcycling requires more decisions per second, and more sheer data processing than nearly any other common activity or sport. The reactions and accurate decision making abilities needed have been likened to the reactions of fighter pilots! The consequences of bad decisions or poor situational awareness are pretty much the same for both groups too.
Occasionally, as a rider I have caught myself starting to make bad or late decisions while riding. In flight training, my instructors called
this being "behind the power curve". It is a mark of experience that when this begins to happen, the rider recognizes the situation, and more importantly, does something about it. A short break, a meal, or even a gas stop can set things right again as it gives the brain a chance to catch up.
Good, accurate, and timely decisions are essential when riding a motorcycle... at least if you want to remain among the living. In short,
the brain needs to keep up with the machine.
I had been banging around the roads of east Texas and as I headed back into Dallas, found myself in very heavy, high-speed traffic on the freeways. Normally, this is not a problem, I commute in these conditions daily, but suddenly I was nearly run down by a cage that decided it needed my lane more than I did. This is not normally a big deal either, as it happens around here often, but usually I can accurately predict which drivers are not paying attention and avoid them before we are even close. This one I missed seeing until it was nearly too late, and as I took evasive action I nearly broadsided another car that I was not even aware was there!
Two bad decisions and insufficient situational awareness... all within seconds. I was behind the power curve. Time to get off the freeway.
I hit the next exit, and as I was in an area I knew pretty well, headed through a few big residential neighborhoods as a new route home. As I turned onto the nearly empty streets I opened the visor on my full-face helmet to help get some air. I figured some slow riding through the quiet surface streets would give me time to relax, think, and regain that "edge" so frequently required when riding.
Little did I suspect...
As I passed an oncoming car, a brown furry missile shot out from under it and tumbled to a stop immediately in front of me. It was a squirrel, and must have been trying to run across the road when it encountered the car. I really was not going very fast, but there was no time to brake or avoid it-it was that close.
I hate to run over animals... and I really hate it on a motorcycle, but a squirrel should pose no danger to me. I barely had time to brace for the impact.
Animal lovers, never fear. Squirrels can take care of themselves!
Inches before impact, the squirrel flipped to his feet. He was standing on his hind legs and facing the oncoming Valkyrie with steadfast resolve in his little beady eyes. His mouth opened, and at the last possible second, he screamed and leapt! I am pretty sure the scream was squirrel for, "Banzai!" or maybe, "Die you gravy-sucking, heathen scum!" as the leap was spectacular and he flew over the windshield and impacted me squarely in the chest.
Instantly he set upon me. If I did not know better I would have sworn he brought twenty of his little buddies along for the attack. Snarling,
hissing, and tearing at my clothes, he was a frenzy of activity. As I was dressed only in a light t-shirt, summer riding gloves, and jeans
this was a bit of a cause for concern. This furry little tornado was doing some damage!
Picture a large man on a huge black and chrome cruiser, dressed in jeans, a t-shirt, and leather gloves puttering maybe 25mph down a quiet residential street... and in the fight of his life with a squirrel. And losing.
I grabbed for him with my left hand and managed to snag his tail. With all my strength I flung the evil rodent off the left of the bike, almost
running into the right curb as I recoiled from the throw.
That should have done it. The matter should have ended right there. It really should have. The squirrel could have sailed into one of the
pristinely kept yards and gone on about his business, and I could have headed home. No one would have been the wiser.
But this was no ordinary squirrel. This was not even an ordinary pissed-off squirrel.
This was an evil attack squirrel of death!
Somehow he caught my gloved finger with one of his little hands, and with the force of the throw swung around and with a resounding thump and an amazing impact he landed square on my back and resumed his rather anti-social and extremely distracting activities. He also managed to take my left glove with him!
The situation was not improved. Not improved at all. His attacks were continuing, and now I could not reach him.
I was startled to say the least. The combination of the force of the throw, only having one hand (the throttle hand) on the handlebars, and
my jerking back unfortunately put a healthy twist through my right hand and into the throttle. A healthy twist on the throttle of a Valkyrie can
only have one result. Torque. This is what the Valkyrie is made for, and she is very, very good at it.
The engine roared as the front wheel left the pavement. The squirrel screamed in anger. The Valkyrie screamed in ecstasy. I screamed
in... well... I just plain screamed.
Now picture a large man on a huge black and chrome cruiser, dressed in jeans, a slightly squirrel torn t-shirt, and only one leather glove
roaring at maybe 70mph and rapidly accelerating down a quiet residential street... on one wheel and with a demonic squirrel on his back. The man and the squirrel are both screaming bloody murder.
With the sudden acceleration I was forced to put my other hand back on the handlebars and try to get control of the bike. This was leaving the mutant squirrel to his own devices, but I really did not want to crash into somebody's tree, house, or parked car. Also, I had not yet figured out how to release the throttle... my brain was just simply overloaded. I did manage to mash the back brake, but it had little affect against the massive power of the big cruiser.
About this time the squirrel decided that I was not paying sufficient attention to this very serious battle (maybe he is a Scottish attack
squirrel of death), and he came around my neck and got IN my full-face helmet with me. As the faceplate closed partway and he began hissing in my face I am quite sure my screaming changed tone and intensity. It seemed to have little affect on the squirrel however.
The rpm's on The Dragon maxed out (I was not concerned about shifting at the moment) and her front end started to drop.
Now picture the large man on the huge black and chrome cruiser, dressed in jeans, a very ragged torn t-shirt, and wearing one leather glove, roaring at probably 80mph, still on one wheel, with a large puffy squirrel's tail sticking out his mostly closed full-face helmet. By now the screams are probably getting a little hoarse.
Finally I got the upper hand... I managed to grab his tail again, pulled him out of my helmet, and slung him to the left as hard as I could. This time it worked... sort-of. Spectacularly sort-of, so to speak.
Picture the scene. You are a cop. You and your partner have pulled off on a quiet residential street and parked with your windows down to do some paperwork.
Suddenly a large man on a huge black and chrome cruiser, dressed in jeans, a torn t-shirt flapping in the breeze, and wearing one leather glove, moving at probably 80mph on one wheel, and screaming bloody murder roars by and with all his strength throws a live squirrel grenade directly into your police car.
I heard screams. They weren't mine...
I managed to get the big motorcycle under directional control and dropped the front wheel to the ground. I then used maximum braking and skidded to a stop in a cloud of tire smoke at the stop sign at a busy cross street.
I would have returned to fess up (and to get my glove back). I really would have. Really. But for two things. First, the cops did not seem
interested or the slightest bit concerned about me at the moment. One of them was on his back in the front yard of the house they had been parked in front of and was rapidly crabbing backwards away from the patrol car. The other was standing in the street and was training a riot shotgun on the police cruiser.
So the cops were not interested in me. They often insist to "let the professionals handle it" anyway. That was one thing. The other? Well, I swear I could see the squirrel, standing in the back window of the patrol car among shredded and flying pieces of foam and upholstery, and shaking his little fist at me. I think he was shooting me the finger...
That is one dangerous squirrel. And now he has a patrol car...
I took a deep breath, turned on my turn-signal, made an easy right turn, and sedately left the neighborhood.
As for my easy and slow drive home? Screw it. Faced with a choice of 80mph cars and inattentive drivers, or the evil, demonic, attack
squirrel of death... I'll take my chances with the freeway. Every time.
And I'll buy myself a new pair of gloves.
CUAgain,
Daniel Meyer
Grab it, man. It is the über-tentacle that rules all other tentacles, seriously.
ok, I'm caught up, everyone quit posting!!!! %-P
It's Friday, Friday (Rebecca Black moment) but it still is not complaint-free!
- I have to buy a cane this weekend to replace my crutch
- Have to spend another $110 on antifungals
- Need to build new computer
- Need to clean old SW off laptop
- Need to keep rebuilding runtime
- Need to grocery shop for frozen dead fish and/or frozen dead crustaceans
- Need to sleep, sleep, sleep
- Need to re-do budget to allow for monthly diabetes/blood pressure pills
- Need to write, write, write
- Need to render, render, render
- Need to activate my Walmart prepaid money card
- Need to do laundry including bedding
- Need to relax
- Need to win the lottery
I think that covers it for the weekend.
@Skriki: ROFL!
Squirrel: 1. Mankind: 0.
complaint, on behalf of my co-workers - i ate a StellaDoro breakfast S and now feeling my stomach starting it's eject sequence. the lady's room is on the other side of the building. if i type fast enough maybe my mind will stop thinking about it and my stomach will stop after being ignored. not sure what uh yigh yigh means, but it seems appropriate. fehh. not sure what fong ghoul means but it also might be appropriate hard to say for sure.
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Metallica is on the radio. unforgiven i think, or nothing matters, one of the slow ones, slow as compared to their usual songs.
Nothing worse than Revenge Of The Meal{(tm). Hopefully things will settle down before the unfortunate happens... :ohh:
Looks like Crrara 8.5 has a new BETA out, oh joy!
I'll install it on the new machine when it's built, I need to clean the laptop off! :long:
Lunch time! Chicken sammich, curried chick peas, and sugar-free Jello! :coolsmile:
Temple Room
You are in a large, open building with Greek-type columns in a circle, with a domed roof overhead. There is a window in the top of the dome letting a shaft of light through, which falls on a stone statue in the middle of the room.
> examine statue
The statue is of a voluptuous woman, who is completely nude. Her right hand is curved as if grasping something, but is empty. She has a somewhat embarrassed look on her face. There's an engraved plate on the base, which reads "NVIATWAS".
> grope statue
A disembodied force slaps you silly, and you hear as if from a great distance: "Pervert!"
:coolgrin: %-P
Oh, ye olde goode Infocom games...
I've owned a book on how to write interactive fiction with a thing called Inform7 for 2 years and have done NOTHING with it!!!! :down: :red:
Soooo, I'm studying it during lunch and at night, and will soon embark on my new game project: "NVIATWAS"! It's goal: t be short, simple, and a hilarious insider joke. :P
Interactive Fiction ties in with my writing and Web comic work, so it makes sense to get back into it. Plus, it's about the only way a single author can write a game, even a very basic 3D game will cost $$$$$$$$ to create. :gulp: Inform7 even lets you have illustrations as part of your story, w00t!
Help save Vicky from the DAZites! :bug:
Yaay!!! Only a few weeks until BATFEST!!!!!!
http://www.roadwayevents.com/RoadStar/Events-cat.asp?media1Id=1323
Two million free-tailed bats! Bands! Food! Dracula! :vampire: Ok, maybe not Dracula... :long:
Can't wait! I'm going to grab my field recorder and windscreen and get some BAT-AUDIO. Quick Robin, the BAT-RECORDER!
heat index is 97 F. But the humidity is 45%. The dew point is 78. The inside of my parent's house is 85 degrees. can we turn the air conditioner on?? lol
A/C seems like a good idea, given the conditions!!! :coolsmile:
home - relief sigh
tornado touched down by Elmira NY, we refer them as upstate from here.
if it ain't too humid tomorrow, i'm gonna walk up to asianfusion place for my miso soup craving.
they have hot sake, i've never tried hot sake.
tomorrow is my big play with fantasy dragon fly day. gonna try and make her into a moon dragon with the new scatter nodes.
Dragons and sake is a very dangerous combination. I wonder if sake made specifically to be consumed by dragon and their kind is any more potent than ours? I bet it is.
Just like large raptors drinking is a bad sign:
maybe sake is the fuel for their fire breath? :)
yayy, found their sake menu
http://azumasushiasianfusion.com/wp/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/006-AZUMA-DINE-IN-MENU_Page_6.jpg
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they really need to hire someone to design their website. omg
Morning. Sleepy Saturday morning in Melbourne, rainy grey and cold :)
sleepy Saturday mornings are the bestest coziest feel good mornings, specially at the start of vacation !
It does feel good to be irresponsible for a couple of weeks, has been a rollercoaster year so far and the batteries need a good recharge :)
the Shrek ft creatures know how to jam :lol: the shrek dragon has lipstick lips
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J3SXbMhfHWM
...and this is just one of the many reasons why I never want to go back into a shared living situation again
I don't think I could ever have respected Dragon as a character if she hadn't redeemed herself by devouring that pint-sized king.
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There are other ways of making a dragon look feminine you know >_>
...unfortunately not as what remains of my family is pretty much on the opposite end of the country from where I am. Idoing so would als mean having to leave my job of over 17 years, which means becoming unemployed in an unforgiving economy. I'm nearly pushing 60 and in spite of all the regulations, age discrimination against older folks is alive and well and the laws very easy to sidestep.
It was clearly a home-defense situation, and I got a license for Concealed-Carrying squirrels too, so I am not particularly worried.
Here's a funny squirrel-related story I read several years ago:
...
...damn good story. I needed something like that today. I can actually picture this fellow speeding through the quiet neighbouirhood on a big V-Twin while locked in a death struggle with the squirrel of the apocalypse.
The Coppers' reaction when said rodentia of doom was flung into their cruiser is almost reminiscent of the old Dukes of Hazzard television programme.
I'd have been freaked about getting rabies (the treatment is most "unpleasant" as I understand) from bites or scratches as many squirrels in the US are infected. The fact it was hissing was definitely not a good thing.
I don't think I could ever have respected Dragon as a character if she hadn't redeemed herself by devouring that pint-sized king.
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There are other ways of making a dragon look feminine you know >_>
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and she spit out the crown :lol:
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and she spit out the crown :lol:
Looked more like she burped it out ^_^
i wore the record out of this song when i was a youngin, first time i'm seeing her in a video
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J3SXbMhfHWM
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remember Kim Wilde
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BzdHxqwTO-4
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remember the 99 balloons
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9whehyybLqU
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omg, i luvvved this video when it came out - take on me
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_QBISF26Kd4
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remember the acoustical jams? the talent shines out
rebel yell
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KN1HFo7g2is
...I especially need to do the last one.
Megabucks for Saturday here is at 2.2 million.
My only "splurges" would be bumming around Europe for about four months or so, a trip to Australia and New Zealand, a trip to Vietnam, and a black early 60s Zil with speakers under the bonnet so I could play the Peter Gunn and 007 theme while cruising though town wearing one of my vintage Hawai'ian shirts, sunglasses (at night) and puffing away on a real Cohiba.
Ambassador Sadesky: "...and I specifically requested Cuban Cigars"
Admiral Randolph: "Try one of these Jamaican cigars, Ambassador. They're pretty good."
Ambassador Sadesky: "Thank you, no. I do not support the work of imperialist stooges. "